Showing posts with label cramps. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cramps. Show all posts

Wednesday, 6 February 2013

The final countdown

Embryo Transfer and the dreaded two week wait

Tuesday was ET day, it was a very exciting day and it pretty much marked a conclusion to our IVF treatment; after waiting for so long and then diving headlong into it, and then feeling rubbish (but very upbeat) throughout, would you think it strange if I told you I found this a little sad? Probably!

We got the call from our embryologist around about 9:30am on Tuesday to tell us we had one über top grade blastocyst for transfer and we have a few for freezing, all good quality blastos but the best with the highest possibility of implanting would be meeting me later. Whoop whoop. Despite having quite a few good quality embryos at the three day stage you always worry that they may not live - it has happened but I was ecstatic to hear that ours were still fighting. I gave verbal consent for them to be frozen - we have some babies in the bank so to speak.

Our appointment was at 2:30pm, you need to have a full bladder for ET as it helps the doctor place the embryo in the right section of the womb (the bladder helps flatten out the womb so when it comes to inserting the catheter into your womb - it practically goes in a straight line). Given the sheer amount of liquid I've been drinking to try and beat the OHSS this wasn't a problem, however - we didn't get seen until 3:30pm - I was full to bursting!!! Like egg collection (EC) day, you need to ensure that you're not wearing any makeup (including nail varnish), perfume - anything smelly and the same goes for your significant other - embryos don't like it so you need to make sure when you are going for EC and ET that you are there as God made you. 

ET doesn't hurt and is much like a smear test as it involves a speculum, unlike having a baseline scan you have an ultrasound - it's via the ultrasound the team can see where to transfer the embryo. There were a legion of people in the room with us: the doctor doing the transfer, two other doctors, a trainee doctor and the embryologist. Initially a lovely, petite Indian lady doctor was supposed to do the ET but when I walked into theatre fully gowned up, I was asked if I minded another doctor doing the ET as he wanted try a new softer catheter (a more senior doctor obviously pulled rank)? I didn't really care who did it, as long as they did it properly and got my mini-me in my womb safely - this doctor seemed like he knew how to do the job! You can't be shy if you're having IVF, your foof is on show for everyone to have a look at. As they were trialling a new catheter we had a mock transfer first, this is fine, do as many practice runs as you like as long as when it comes to the real thing - it's done correctly (I didn't doubt the doctor's competence at any time btw). Yes ladies - you can't be shy about this; imagine you are on a dentist like chair with you legs in stirrups, much like a smear there's a speculum and it's clamped in for a good while, your chair is then winched up and there is a bright yellow shining light beaming at your foof where both male and female doctors will be having a look, all to ensure the safe delivery of your mini-me. This is what ET is like! The bonus of all of this is we not only got to see our mini-me hatching out of it's shell in the petri dish on the big plasma screen just before transfer, but we also saw it being inserted into my womb (not very clearly, but you could see it). This was awesome (and it brings a tear to my eye when I think about it - absolutely amazing).

A day five hatching blastocyst - this is what our mini-me looked like before transfer, ripe for attaching and implanting (fingers crossed).



Kings ACU use the Gardener scale for grading Blastocysts, the stage of development of the blastocyst(s) is graded from 1 - 6, and the outer and inner cell masses are graded from A-C. The inner cell mass forms what will become the baby (this is what you can see hatching out of the picture above), the outer cell mass or trophectoderm will become the placenta. The stage of development and quality of the outer and inner cell masses is scored as per the tables below. I've included this technical shizzle as it can be hard to remember everything as and when you're told it due to adrenalin, and given how you are positioned in theatre.

The Gardener blastocyst grading system assigns three seperate quality scores to each blastocyst embryo:

  1. Blastocyst development stage - expansion and hatching status
  2. Inner cell mass (ICM) score, or quality
  3. Trophectoderm (TE) score, or quality


Expansion
grade
Blastocyst development and stage status
1
Blastocoel cavity less than half the volume of the embryo
2
Blastocoel cavity more than half the volume of the embryo
3
Full blastocyst, cavity completely filling the embryo
4
Expanded blastocyst, cavity larger than the embryo, with thinning of the shell
5
Hatching out of the shell
6
Hatched out of the shell


ICM grade
Inner cell mass quality
A
Many cells, tightly packed
B
Several cells, loosely grouped
C
Very few cells


TE grade
Trophectoderm quality
A
Many cells, forming a cohesive layer
B
Few cells, forming a loose epithelium
C
Very few large cells

What I am really pleased to say is that our mini-me is a grade 5AA - this is the best type of blastocyst that can be transferred, and from what I understand is a bit like gold dust in the murky world of IVF/ICSI. Grade 6 blastos need to hatch in the womb so I was pleased as punch to see that we now have the best possible chance of success, our mini-me was ripe for implantation, fingers and toes crossed.

Test day is Friday 15 February 2013: gulp. 

This is nine long days away. I am so looking forward to that day but it also scares the be-jesus out of me. It's REALLY hard not to dwell and over analyse every twinge (Google at times can be your own worst enemy). Those cramps I can feel, are they implantation cramps or is it my ovaries groaning with the last bit of OHSS or is it the progesterone pessaries? Questions, questions, questions. And it's because of all these questions, lack of activity and waiting that make the two week wait (or the 11 day wait for a five day transfer as in my case) the hardest part of IVF: am I pregnant or not - please somebody tell me!!! BUT one must wait patiently for the outcome of one's endeavours. There's no point in testing too early as you could get a big fat positive (BFP) due to residual HCG being in your system from the trigger shot done 36 hours prior to egg collection. I know of a friend who tested too early and got a BFP, and then ended up getting a big fat negative (BFN) when it came to test day. I can't put myself through that so I shall have to be patient and wait until the morning of 15 February.

I haven't worked out how I will tell people yet, what I do know, if its a BFN I'm not going to want to talk about it and I won't want to have to repeat the news, and I will crumble but for the minute the Hubster and I remain hopeful. Hopeful that our mini-me is bedding down for some VIP womb action and at the moment it feels like that might be happening but only time will tell, as I said - it could be anything. We have done everything humanly possible to make this work and we have a great chance of success but there are no guarantees.

So I'm signing off for now, the next nine days are going to be long but this is where my IVF Belief CD comes into it's own. The third and final message is about deep relaxation and positive visualisation and it really helps me chill and focus all my positive energy to my womb and our mini-me. I'm going to be listening to it lots. Please sprinkle oodles of baby dust our way and pray we get the result we so want.

Catch ya later :) x

Saturday, 26 January 2013

Stimulation overdrive...

Day 11 of stims

Yesterday was such a full-on, emotional day that I just didn't have the energy required to focus enough for a blog post, so here goes.

I was right - there has been a lot of activity going on downstairs as I have a whopping 26 follicles - whoop whoop whoop and my gosh - they're large! Not quite large enough for egg collection (EC) on Monday but it will be happening on Wednesday. However, this means that I am now at a high risk of developing OHSS - boo.  After my scan (which was fascinating) I saw one of the nurses (Laura) and she ran through with me when I would be taking my last buserelin and Gonal F jabs and what the scenario would be for either a Monday or Wednesday EC (and gave me an anal suppository for EC day - gosh this IVF shizzle is sooooo sexy eh?!) I then had to see a doctor, who ran through with us what all the risks are with OHSS and what would I like to do with regards to my treatment:

a) Cancel my treatment - NO WAY JOSÉ!!!
b) Freeze my eggs and then carry on with treatment at a later date - NO WAY JOSÉ AGAIN! The treatment options on the NHS aren't as generous as they used to be and with only getting one fully-funded full cycle on the NHS we're not doing that!
c) Continue with treatment - YES WAY!!!

Doc mentioned how healthy I am, said my womb lining looks nice and thick, the reason for my enthusiastic response is due to being so healthy so this is good. Nice thick lining is the way forward if I want a successful implantation - this is what all the co-enzyme q10 is for - to help encourage a succesful implantation.

However, my pains are going to get worse, when I take my HCG trigger shot at 9pm on Monday evening I'm going to feel crap afterwards (OHSS thrives under HCG), after EC I will feel momentarily better but my follicles will fill back up with liquid and I will start feeling like crap again and after embryo transfer (ET) and presuming pregnancy occurs - oh yes - I will feel even more crap! What happens (as explained in my previous post), after the ovaries start going a bit crazy and keep on producing follicles that keep expanding - (this is the cause of the pain - 26 follicles all around 18m in diameter each - how the hell is all of that fitting in my womb? No wonder I've been feeling uncomfortable?!) The follicles are filling with liquid, this can seep out into the abdomen (hence looking out for water retention and bloating), but this can also show itself in fat ankles, a shortness of breath, dark coloured pee, resulting in nausea and vomiting and God forbid a blood clot. If I get a lot of water around my tummy, I'll have a drain fitted and as long as we are comfortable changing the drain I can have this at home, worst case scenario I'll have to go into hospital. I have been reassured that at Kings they have only had to cancel one IVF cycle as a result of OHSS, and that as this is always treated it's not fatal. What is reassuring to know is that OHSS doesn't impact on the likelihood of IVF resulting in a pregnancy (nor does it harm a pregnancy), and the staff at Kings are going to be keeping an eye on me and will be calling me daily after EC to check up on how I am feeling.

So yesterday, the Hubster and I were buzzing with nerves but mainly excitement - I can't quite believe that after trying for yonks, jumping through hoops with the NHS to get treatment, and then lockdown we are finally here. To think that this time next week there could be oodles of mini-me embryos all dividing on a petri dish waiting to be transferred into my womb (baby-house - this is what I hope it will be known as for the next nine months). SO EXCITING!!!

I have never, ever wanted something as bad as I want this - please, please, please let it work. If you are reading this please pray to whatever deity rocks your boat that this works. I am most certainly going to mass tomorrow - I/we have never, ever wanted anything as bad as we want this - I need to start showing my face at mass more often anyhow so there's no better time to start than now in my opinion. The nurse said I am a textbook case so far and given our positive, cheery outlook and healthy living there is no reason why we won't be pregnant this time next month. She also said that the Hubster's swimmers improvement is "commendable!" How awesome is that?! We were told at the beginning of treatment we have 40% chance of success (which is high going by IVF standards - I think this must've improved with all of our healthy living?)

So I've spoken to work about the posibility of developing OHSS, I don't think it went in really but if I feel in the slightest bit squiffy I shan't be going in to work - this is too important. I do feel at the moment like I'm about to come on - my lower abdomen is very firm to the touch and I have been getting pangs in my left side by my left ovary - this makes sense as there are 14 follicles on that side (and by the feel of it as I am on stims now for another two days I wouldn't be surprised if more follicles rock up), my boobs have gone from being deflated a couple of weeks ago to being back to their pre-menstrual self - larger and a bit tender - so yes - I feel like I feel when I am about to ovulate. With regards to the foo'ju - I told the nurses they need to tell ladies this shizzle! Needless to say they cracked up - not everyone gets it apparently but still - I can't see the harm in forewarning ladies that they may get it?!

So exciting days ahead, in the meantime I need to keep an eye on myself, make sure I'm drinking lots of water and I need to monitor the colour of my pee. I know one person who has had OHSS as a result of IVF and she had to go into hospital and I know from her account that is excruciatingly painful. She did get two beautiful baby girls from her IVF stint (first go) though - Molly and Josie - they are gorgeous so it's worth it. Kids hey - what - us ladies go through to get them? A friend of mine and his wife are also having IVF, at Kings and their EC is on Monday, another friend I know has had just her fourth ET, another friend of mine has had several IVF journeys and is now going down the surrogacy route, a parent from my Beaver Scout group went through IVF seven times to get her lovely boy Jonnie and someone at work is currently expecting (and she has the most gorgeous bump - she is positively glowing) - her pregnancy is a result of her first IVF attempt. My point is that IVF and infertility needn't be the taboo that it is, it's more common than we think. I am convinced we will get pregnant - my friends are all popping babies out left right and centre at the moment and I'm not going to lie and say I don't find it hard as I do find it hard - very hard but this gives me hope; hope that our journey is going to be a short(ish) one by IVF standards and I am going to join my bessie mates and have a mini-me of my own.

I'm actually off to meet one of my bessie mates for brunch this morning so I need to get a move on - it's just us two this morning, her wee man (affectionately referred to as "The Dude") is hanging out with Daddy this morning whilst us girls chew the fat. Tomorrow marks 17 years to the day when I first clapped eyes on the Hubster so I may see if I can find him a little pressie to say thank you for being amazing (that means I have spent 50% of my life with my wonderful Hubster - eeek! We REALLY deserve a break and to be able to have our own family - 17 years shouldn't be sniffed at). We don't normally do stuff like that - spend lots of money on presents on anniversaries - that is NOT the key to a long-relationship: love, trust, laughter and honesty are, not excessive gift giving (but that lecture is for another time). BUT my lovely Hubster deserves a little something, even if it is a silly a present - just to say thank you don't you think?

I must dash - catch ya later :) xxx